Letting Go of the Superman Cape: Coaching Your Team to Think for Themselves

There’s no problem adopting a coaching style on your team and letting people do their best thinking. The only problem is you.

Hey my padi,

Did you know that stepping into a leadership role instantly makes you “the point of escalation” for every problem that arises? The funny thing is, you can slip into this role without even realizing it. One minute you’re just “going about your daily 2k”, and the next, you’re the go-to person for everything from minor hiccups to major crises.

When I clocked 15, I became the “point of escalation” in my father’s house. Whenever NEPA took light and power was out (which happened a lot), guess who had to switch on the generator? Yep, me. And this wasn’t a fancy push-button generator either—I had to yank that cord like I was starting an airplane engine.

Fast forward to my adult life: I woke up one morning as a single man and by the end of that day, I was married (of course to the LOML). Suddenly, I became the “point of escalation” for everything. Anytime something didn’t look right—whether it was a charger that wasn’t ‘charging’ or a mysterious figure on the bank statement—it all got escalated to me.

Now, don’t get me wrong—I don’t just go fixing things left and right. No! In my house, I’m a “Question Ninja.” When my wife says, “The phone charger isn’t working,” I don’t just rush to buy a new one. I ask, “Did you try charging another phone?” If she says yes, I’ll follow up with, “Are you sure the socket is on?” Nine times out of ten, she’ll discover it’s the extension socket that’s on, but the main wall switch is off!

The thing is, most people don’t take this approach at work. They just throw answers at their team like darts at a board, hoping one will stick. But here’s the trick: asking the right questions doesn’t just fix problems—it teaches people to think through solutions themselves. That’s where coaching comes in.

Coaching is NOT Micromanaging
Coaching is all about guiding people toward the answers rather than giving them the answers. It’s not training (that’s an event with a start and an end), and it’s not about holding hands every step of the way. It’s like giving someone the map to a treasure chest but letting them find the X on their own.

Let me share a quick story: As an SME (Subject Matter Expert), I once led a team of seven in a Health-Tech company. Whenever something seemed unresolvable, the common practice was to escalate the issue to me, but I took a different approach.

My Strategy
With my manager’s support, I developed Standard Operating Procedures (SOPs) to standardize our work. Once these SOPs were in place, I no longer spoon-fed answers. Instead, I’d ask:
“Have you checked the SOP?”
“What do you suggest?”
“What do you think is right or wrong?”

At first, it felt wrong—even I second-guessed myself. But I stood my ground. Weeks passed, and guess what? They started using the resources we had developed and troubleshooting independently. Before I knew it, they were smashing our weekly goals by mid-week and even identifying bugs and edge cases.

The Magic of Empowering Teams
It didn’t just make them better—it made the entire team better. It meant my manager could take a holiday, and I could call in sick without worrying that everything would crumble. And when we got back, the team was performing even better than before we left!

So, here’s the thing: There’s no problem adopting a coaching style on your team and letting people do their best thinking. The only problem is you. Yeah, you’ve been programmed to call the shots, throw answers at people, and play the superhero because, well, you know everything (or so you think).

But if you keep this up, you may never get the chance to leave work on time, and you’ll find yourself scrolling through Instagram with your eyes half-closed because you’re that exhausted.

If you’re imagining a team where everyone’s doing random things when you give up some control, you’ve got the wrong picture. What I’m suggesting is a team where everyone has the ability to think, solve problems, and execute, often in ways that might surprise you. If they’re not making the decision you would have made, it’s probably a better one!

Embrace Coaching and Trust Your People
It’s time to move some authority to where the information is. Stop solving every little problem and empower your team to own their decisions. You might just discover that with a little nudge, your team is capable of turning water into wine—or at least turning a 5-day SLA into 1 day, faster than I did.

So, what’s the next best thing you can do for your team today? Stop being “Mr. or Ms. Escalation” and start being the leader who coaches, guides, and empowers. You’ll be surprised how much time you’ll free up for dinner with the love of your life.

Tomiwa
Lean Process Improvement Enthusiast
(Not adding anything cheeky this week)